Winning back your girlfriend takes time, perseverance, and a well-thought out plan. You need to be mentally and emotionally strong enough not to make the common mistakes that push an ex away, while being cool enough to know exactly what to do. Before establishing contact with your ex again, you'll first need to break up. In learning how to get back an ex-girlfriend, step one always includes accepting your own breakup and then dropping out of sight for a while. This is the only way to make your ex miss you.
Just because you're out of sight doesn't mean you're out of your ex girlfriend's mind. Actually, just the opposite is true. The less she hears from you, the more she's going to wonder where you are. After ending the relationship, your ex still needs to see how you're handling it. She actually wants to see you upset: this re-enforces the fact that you loved and needed her in her own mind. So why would you not want to do this? Because it makes her comfortable. Getting your ex back is all about putting her out of that comfort zone and into the world of the unknown.
Instead of "being around" for her through phone calls, text-messages, emails, or whatever, your disappearance will have her (even ever-so-slightly) questioning the break up. When she knew where you were? No problem. But now that she doesn't? Your ex has to face a future that might not include you in it... in any capacity at all. This scares any girl, even the one who did the dumping.
Once you've been gone for a while, there's a very good chance your ex tries to contact you. But if she doesn't? Eventually the time will come to reestablish contact with your ex on your own. The following five ideas are a great way to accomplish this, but each of them requires you be careful and do things correctly:
1) Calling Your Ex - After breaking up, you'll need to have really broken contact with your ex girlfriend for a while before you can call her again. Once she starts believing that you've moved on, your ex is going to be craving some sort of answer as to what you've been up to. At this point, a phone call won't be seen as an attempt to win your ex back. She'll be more curious to know what's going on with you than she will be suspicious about your ulterior motives. You'll need to have a reason to call your ex, so make it a good one. One good idea is calling your ex girlfriend on her birthday. If it hasn't been too soon after the breakup, this type of call comes off as sweet and innocent. It's also a lot more personal than an email or text-message. Sending her flowers is a bad idea, and you can't send her a card just yet. But a birthday call from your ex-boyfriend *after* you haven't heard from him a long while? It's going to definitely get this girl thinking about you again, and it shows you're thinking of her in a good way.
2) Arranging to Bump Into Your Ex - The trickiest of all ex-girlfriend contact scenarios, this one must be handled with extreme caution. If you haven't seen or talked to your ex for a long while, and you know where to find her, arranging to "accidentally" run into her can sometimes be beneficial. You need to make absolutely sure she doesn't know you arranged this meeting; even a little suspicion can blow the whole thing. Say hello, be happy to see her, and keep it quick and casual. She hasn't seen you in a while so she'll be curious as to where you've been - you can tell her, but don't stumble over too much detail. Make sure you look and sound your best. If you're with friends, break away from them for a minute to say hello to her. When a minute or two has gone by, excuse yourself and take off... lingering too long is a bad idea. You want to put yourself back into her head, but not look like you're trying to.
3) Emailing Your Ex Girlfriend - In some cases a phone call might be too "out of the blue" awkward, and a face-to-face meeting might not be possible. If this is the case, you can sometimes pull off sending your ex an email. You'll need to have a good reason to do it though: the "I just wanted to say hi" email is weak and contrived, and your ex will know it. Hopefully you left something over her house and you can use this as an ice-breaker to ask for it back... but just make sure it's something substantial. Don't email your ex to ask for your copy of some crappy CD back. Another good idea? Try to bump into a common friend. An email that starts with "Hey, you'll never believe who I saw yesterday..." piques her interest and gives you an excuse to start up a conversation. Just make sure it's been a long while since she's heard from you. The longer the better, as it gives you more credibility that you're not just trying to get back with your ex. Even though you are, you're not tipping that hand just yet.
These are just some of the ways you can reconnect with your ex. The important thing to remember here is that you can't reach out for this type of ex girlfriend contact until you've established yourself as having dropped off her radar for a while. No breakup will be reversed until the person who ended the relationship both misses and wants the other person back. And you can't accomplish that major detail without first giving her a chance to wonder where you are.